An official complaint against Marvin von Hagen
Marvin told Henry to haggle for Poke Ultra. Henry haggled. There is, in fact, no haggling allowed. This is the public record of that betrayal, and a place to file your own grievances.
Lies Marvin Told Me
A non-exhaustive ledger, updated as new lies surface.
“Haggling is allowed.”
Haggling is not allowed. It has never been allowed. The price is the price, Marvin.
“GO Plus+ is lost. Gone forever. A tragedy.”
It was in the bag. The entire time. Right there. In the bag.
“Poke Ultra unlocks a secret tier of bargaining power.”
It unlocks the checkout page. At full price.
“Just ask nicely and they'll knock 40% off.”
Henry asked nicely. Henry asked again. The number did not move.
“Everyone haggles, it's basically expected of you.”
Nobody haggles. Henry was the only person haggling. People stared.
“Trust me, I do this all the time.”
There is no evidence Marvin has ever successfully haggled for anything.
The Haggle Button
Go ahead. Try to haggle. Marvin said you could. The button has a different opinion.
Hover over the button to begin negotiations.
File a complaint
Tell us how Marvin’s phantom haggling policy wronged you. Submissions are entirely fake and go absolutely nowhere, which is more than Henry’s haggling did.